Since yesterday’s Reader Survey, I have been riveted (is that the right word? Whatever, I’m usin’ it!) by all of your responses! I wasn’t quite sure what to expect, and a teeny tiny part of me was scared that I’d get an outpour of cruel, anonymous feedback, because, you know, #TheInternet. But actually your feedback so far has been really loving, supportive, and constructive. If you all weren’t totally rocking my world before, then I’m pretty head over heels right meow. If you haven’t taken the survey yet, then follow me right this way. It’ll be open for about a week!
I’m planning to share all the results next month, but for now, one thing that a few people mentioned is that, for a “personal blog,” The Nectar Collective isn’t all that personal. Zing! Actually, not really, since that’s totally true! Let me essplain. I’ll be honest with you, sharing my personal life on this blog is something I’ve struggled with since the very beginning because I never really wanted The Nectar Collective to be a blog about my life. I do want TNC to be a relatable, useful, and inviting community, but I don’t want the posts here to center around my day-to-day.
One day, I’d love for TNC to be the kind of blog that doesn’t quite feel like a blog. The kind with (paid!) contributors, multiple (kickass!) posts per day, and a big ol’ community of thoughtful people who start their day with a cup o’ joe and The Nectar Collective. A girl can dream, can’t she? On that same stroke, I don’t ever want TNC to feel soul-less or corporate. I hope that whatever it is or becomes, it will always feel more like letters from a friend than an email from your boss.
So I guess what I’m getting at is that I will aim to infuse TNC with more of my (and Monja’s!) personal life, but also want to share with you that TNC probably won’t ever be completely about my lifestyle. Hopefully we can find a middle ground that we both enjoy, ya dig? Do you have any suggestions for how I could incorporate more of my personal life into this blog in a way that might feel good for us both? Currently, I do monthly check-ins and share about my week during Weekly Wishes each Monday. If you’ve got any tips for other ways I could make TNC more personal, I’d love to hear them. 🙂
One way that I’ve tried inserting more of “me” into my blog is by adding occasional style posts. I think style is very personal, and I enjoy the creative process that goes into everything from picking a photoshoot location to what color lipstick I should wear. I’m hoping to buy a new camera soon (any suggestions?) and really want to style some quirky + fun photoshoots.
I think today’s outfit is pretty indicative of my typical style. I tend to go for jeans, simple tops, and something colorful or kind of funky to add a little “flair” (that word always reminds me of Office Space) to my attire. The shirt I’m wearing is actually made for yoga, so the material is soft and the back is super cute + unique! Seriously, work-out clothes that double as regular clothes? I’m sold. You can peep all the outfit details below!
Outfit Details:
Shirt: (c/o Yoga Outlet)…they’re having a big sale right now, go check it out!
Purse: Target (here) | Sweater: Forever 21 (old) | Jeans: H&M | Shoes: Target (old) | Necklace: Forever 21
How would you describe your personal style?
p.s. The winner of the blog consultation giveaway is Jordan Powell! WOOOO! I’ll be in touch via email with the details! If you didn’t win, you can always book your own session. One of my recent consultation clients sent me an email saying, “Honestly, I told everyone about our wonderful conversation and I loved every minute of our chat!” I’m kind of loving these already. 🙂
Thank you so much for explaining the thoughts behind how you see TNC evolving – that casts everything into a new light for me, and totally makes me understand where you’re coming from. I was one of the people who gave the personal-blog-but-not-so-personal feedback, and reading this, I totally feel bad about that now. I don’t know, you’re just so wonderful, I love hearing about your day! Maybe that could be something, like “a day in the life” kind of posts? Or like little “behind the scenes” looks?
You’re so sweet, Johanna! 🙂 I totally don’t want you to feel bad and I really did appreciate those comments about TNC not feeling personal enough (you weren’t the only one!). It’s something I think I’ve been bad at since the beginning, and I’ll either absentmindedly not share about my life for months or go way overboard to compensate and then feel weird about sharing too much and falling off the path I originally intended for my blog. It’s something I’ll try to work on though, and I think the ideas you suggested in your comment are great! I’ll definitely try to add something like that in soon. 🙂 Thanks for your feedback and ALL of your support. 🙂
I honestly know the feeling, that line between personal and too personal is such a wobbly, subjective thing! If they’re like me, other people probably just mentioned wanting to know more about you because you’re doing such interesting things, and we’d like to be a part of that! It’s equal parts nosiness and genuine curiosity 🙂
I love yogaoutlet.com and totally wear yoga gear to the office and double it as regular clothes. I also think that a personal space can have limits. For example, I never really talk about my husband on the blog but I still consider it a personal blog. Good luck with all your blogging goals!
That’s awesome that you shop at YogeOutlet.com already. 🙂 They have some cute stuff! And you’re totally right about personal blogs having their limits, too. I guess it’s all up to each individual. 🙂
I always tell my clients good writing is honest writing! I mix personal in with business writing, and it seems to make readers happy. And this is all one big experiment anyway, right? Have fun with it!
I totally agree that good writing is honest writing! 🙂
I’m definitely with you on not wanting my blog to be TOO personal. I try to incorporate what I can of my life, but I don’t want it to be just my day-to-day or like a diary. I’d rather She is Fierce be a place people go for thoughtful essays, new ideas, and advice – that’s one of the things I love about The Nectar Collective! I don’t come here to hear about your weekend, you know? I think you’re doing a great job!
Thank you so much, Kiersten! I think you definitely get where I’m coming from and I’d like my blog to be similar to what you mentioned about your vision for your blog! Thanks for sharing and keep up the great work on She Is Fierce! 🙂
this outfit is so cute!
Thanks Jess! 🙂
I love everything about your blog and your style of blogging…you really have been such an inspiration to me on my blogging journey and I love reading anything you put out there into the interweb land! I know i’m saving up my pennies to have one of your blog consultations. I’m really excited to see where you take TNC and will be following along your journey.
xoxo Amber
I really like this. I’ve been avoiding the day to day life posts for a while now because it’s not what I look to read and it’s not what I want to share. I do like getting to know the person behind the blog, through style posts, or comments or opinion pieces but to be honest, I read blogs because they give me ideas or share topics I am interested in. I don’t love reading about what someone did for 8 hours (ex. started with this breakfast, then went for a run, then stretched). I know these are also very popular blogs, but they’re not for me. When I look at the big players, I think a large part of why they’re big is because they’ve created a community and brand, but it’s also providing their readers with information, not just a play by play.
I can totally relate to what you said about not wanting to make your blog about your day-to-day life. I have a lifestyle blog too (although it’s much smaller than yours 🙂 and I’ve been struggling with the same issue. People keep on saying they’d like me to share more about my personal life but that’s not really what I’m into. I actually smiled when you mentioned that your dream was to turn TNC into a group effort one day because that’s what I had in mind when I started my blog too! Anyway, I really love your blog so whatever you decide to do with it in the future I’m sure I’ll continue to love and read it!
I think there is a difference between “private” and “personal”. One can still be personal without being too private so to speak. I love when you add photos of yourself; it makes it more fun to read! And things you share that are based on your opinions too! I also love your “get better at blogging” posts, they are also personal because they are written from your perspective!
i struggle with the same problem by having a personal blog, what do you post and what dont you post? and i love the quote the struggle is real
I guess it is tough finding that balance, but a lot of bigger blogs are now branching out and becoming a little more like magazines. Take, A Beautiful Mess for example – I still find Elsie and Emma incredibly personal without being corporate I guess because they still keep the same laid back, fun style they always had and the quality of their photos and content hasn’t suffered. All they have now is an even bigger library of content to choose from, and yeah, maybe they’re not replying to comments as much but I think they’re a really good example of someone who’s found the balance you’re looking for.
I think you’re totally right, Ruth! I definitely thought of them when writing this post. They make it look so easy to be super professional and awesome while also being your internet BFFs. 🙂
Most of the time when writing blog entries, I try to focus more on my thoughts and opinions than my social life, though sometimes the two things intertwine. I think that’s okay as long as there is some point to what you are doing.
Sometimes though, it is fun and exciting to write about the big things that are going on in your life (e.g. holidays or pets), and that’s fine too! Sometimes I will feel like writing about my personal life and sometimes I won’t.
I really enjoy reading your blog and am looking forward to future posts 🙂
http://www.whatthefudge14.blogspot.co.uk
Lucy x
When you share your thoughts and your work, I feel like that’s pretty personal. At least for me, and my blog is much smaller, every time I hit publish I’m sharing a piece of myself with whoever may happen to read my blog. Sometimes it’s a funny story about what I did, or something I loved, or studying abroad. You may not give us a rundown of your social life, but you do include things about Monja and your life (although, I would certainly not object to more Monja-time), and what you’re thinking about. I love reading your blog every day since I found it a few months ago, and while I may not always comment I always love to read it! It truly is a community for people to come together and share their thoughts and ideas, and I love that about TNC. Basically, what I’m trying to say is that thank you for being you, and thank you for being awesome and sharing it with the rest of us!
xo,
Zoe | La Vie en Zoe
Hi Mel! I honestly think you have the perfect mix on your blog! I love that you’re able to keep things professional while allowing your voice to shine through! I love that I’m able to read a super informative post about blogging, writing, design, etc., yet feel like I’m sitting with you over coffee. This “feeling” I get when reading your content is the same mix I hope to achieve with my blog some day!
Keep doing you, Mel! I think your blog is amazing and there isn’t anything I’d change!
i think since you’ve come back to the states you’ve done a great job incorporating more personal information on here! i love the monthly ‘check in’s’ and hearing about what your week has going on in the weekly wishes. you’ve also shared about your musical fesitvals, a camping trip (if i remember correctly).. and other things you’re up to! I think you’re doing wonderfully! I know you’ve written before about how you try to make sure your posts are always useful to your readers and i think you do a great job of that, with some personal posts mixed in. i think it’s a pretty great balance you have goin on already! but i would def love to see more style posts mixed in, cuz you’re so cute!
Can I just give you a virtual hug? That makes me so happy that you recognize and remember those times when I tried to share some of my personal life. All of your references to past posts make me feel like you really engage here and remember things and that actually means so much to me! I have some plans for more creative style posts in the future too, so I’m excited about that! Thanks for your support, Codi. 🙂
I like your blog because it is neat, professional looking, and I can always get good blog tips. Some blogs are very bland, busy (i feel like I’m in a fun house), and sponsor/ad heavy which to me looks like the person is trying to hard- not a good thing IMO. I went to a blog a few minutes ago and I couldn’t get out of a pop up add. It kept coming up and up and up. I just gave up trying to read the article and Xed out of the blog entirely. I think that even though sponsors are great, sometimes they can be the death of your blog. I kinda like that your blog isn’t that personal…it makes it more interesting! 🙂 Keep it up!
Thank you for all that, Ginny! I really appreciate your feedback and your comments made me super happy! I also laughed at the fact that you think some blogs look like a fun house because I totally get that! ha! Thanks for the encouragement. 🙂
Hi Mel~
It’s good to hear you got good feedbacks from the survey (I sent mine the first day ♥).
Oh! And I loved your outfit. The purse is super cute, I like to use small purses or bags.
Overall I think I like simple, cute and relaxed styles. I always use jeans, flats and a cute & comfortable shirt 😀
Hope you have a great weekend. Greetings ♥.
MONJA MUSINGS!!!! You have some whitty humor when it comes to writing from his point of view, and they are really fun and creative. But you already know I miss that series anyway 🙂
I just found your blog but yes, I struggle to make things “personal” as well. Although I think it’s important to remember that the blogger is in control of the blog and you can do whatever you want. 🙂 Anyway I think your blog is awesome and I def plan on reading more of it! 🙂
It’s so funny that you bring up the struggle of being personal when running a personal blog haha! Having just gotten back into the swing of writing, I’m feeling quite conflicted at the moment. I don’t want the blog to sound like a daily journal, but I do want people to feel like they’re hearing my ‘story’ because in the end, that’s part of what get readers coming back… it’s tricky, but I think the Nectar Collective is pretty great, and btw, you DO have at least 1 reader who scrolls through your pages over her morning coffee (or sometimes green tea 😉 )
xx
I struggle with this too. I write mostly about travel because that’s what I’m doing with my life right now. But what I really enjoy is writing anecdotes, reflections, or day-to-day. But I feel like that’s not what people care about reading, and would rather hear about tips or things to do. Personally though, I prefer personal blogs/stories because that’s what makes me connect with the blogger. The Londoner is an example of a successful personal blog. But I think it’s best if a post has personal aspects as well as tips to help or inspire others. I think you already do great with that!
I consider my blog to be a personal blog, but, like you, I like to share occasional outfit posts, when I’m having a good outfit day. It’s hard sharing personal stuff though. I’ll admit, I haven’t been completely open on my blog when it comes to the every day struggles.
I’ve been ‘struggling’ with this a bit too, as someone who offers creative services I’ve realized it’s a bit daunting to have my name attached to a personal blog as opposed to it being attached to my work, so I’ve not been sure what to do with my blogging as of late!
Great post, I think you were onto something when you wrote “I hope that whatever it is or becomes, it will always feel more like letters from a friend than an email from your boss.” !!
Melyssa –
I stray away from blogland every now and then, but even when I’m not actively blogging your site is still one I visit nearly everyday. I think I kind of felt a shift in TNC a while ago and I had a vague idea that TNC was starting to be less of a ‘personal blog’ and more of a inspirational/positive living lifestyle type of blog (if that makes sense). Something similar to A Beautiful Mess but less DIY and more positive-living/inspirational.
I like to stop by TNC because it’s inspiring to see TNC grow so much and to see you grow in your success! I absolutely do get inspired when I visit your site, and I think it’s pretty badass that you’ve built such a positive/supportive community here.
I look forward to seeing the site grow even more. Girl when you start taking contributors I’ll be first in line! 🙂
Happy weekend,
Zauni.
Gosh, could you be any sweeter, Zauni?! This comment totally made my day! I really appreciate that you continue to visit my blog and that you enjoy your time here. That means so much! I would love for you to be a contributor one day! Hopefully sooner than later. 🙂 Thanks for all your support! <3
I can understand why you have made it less personal and want to make it seem more professional without giving it the cold feel to it. And I feel like you do that! It’s a light, bubbly blog that I like reading from time to time, so I think you are doing a good job. I hope you manage to keep the balance between a stylish blog and also one that readers can feel isn’t formal but is more so enjoyable to read.
Check out my post about The Incredibles: http://olivia-savannah.blogspot.nl/2014/08/top-10-things-i-learned-from-incredibles.html
I write for a magazine so my blog posts can be a bit like feature articles, but I have a ‘personal’ voice to keep it more relaxed. Then some posts can be show more of me. I tend to mix it up.
I’m over at http://www.sweetwordsprettypictures.com
I LOVE the vision for your blog. You actually articulated a lot of thoughts I have about my own blog. Every once in a while I get a little panicked that too much of “me” is out on the internet to see and feel really vulnerable. But then I review my posts and remind myself how little of “me” I actually do write about. I want my blog to be more of a place that makes readers think and inspires them to grow than a personal blog. Sometimes it’s a little discouraging because I see a lot of bloggers get really positive feedback from their intensely personal posts- that’s just not my style as of right now.
But speaking of Style- yours is just great! Your bangs are adorable and I love that sweater! So cute! I’m inspired to go put on something fun to wear today!
as much as you don’t share a ton a ‘personal’ details, that doesn’t mean people don’t get to kind of know who you are. Your personality is very evident in your writing and it’s one of the reasons I continue to read, and to me, the biggest reason I continue to read any blog. So you have that. 😉
I did a survey before I rebranded and the feedback I received was a request for style posts and to see more of who I am. I’ve been working to incorporate that because I am very private and taking styled shots for my blog isn’t necessarily me. But infusing who we are into our blog is what makes your blog authentic and totally you.
You’ve done a great job of sharing who you are through your writing AND through the different things you’ve done/ideas you’ve come up with to cultivate community. Your readers should be able to get a good sense of who you are through those actions and through your online voice.
Also, if you do feel the need to share more on your blog – maybe do a personal post and/or opinion pieces. I personally think the nectar collective is doing great and will continue to be great, whatever your next path for the brand may be!
Your writing lets your personality comes through, but if you want to get more personal without getting too personal (if ya know what I mean) then posts about style is good – I am void of any style, I wish I had some … anyhoo … also just posts about a place you have visited. My blog – which is nowhere as big/popular as yours – is an expat lifestyle thingy and I just write about food I’ve tried, places I have visited or the struggles/joys of being an expat. Nothing too personal is mentioned as such … just a few thoughts.
My struggle is actually that I treat my blog like an online diary, so it’s really personal, which makes it harder for some readers to relate to. I think that my blog turned out this way, because my readership is quite small and mostly consists of my high school friends (we’re about to start our freshman year of college). I’m constantly trying to think of ways to make my posts more relatable while still including bits and pieces of my life and without making longwinded connections 😛 -Audrey | Brunch at Audrey’s
The second paragraph – where you mentioned paid contributors with multiple posts per day – made me feel like squealing. I think it could be cool to have, almost magazine-like, and I’ve really tried in the past to make something like this, but the whole planning process was just… it was overwhelming and clashed with my other projects, thus I just dropped said idea altogether. If I’m misunderstanding what you were talking about, I’m sorry. 😡 It’s just my impression of it.
If it is what you were inferring, I think as long as the contributions have similar tones to the ‘letters from a friend’ idea, then the feeling of the site won’t change.
All in all, I feel personal blogs bring up a lot of controversy, be it the genre in general, or the content of the blogs. How personal must a blog get in order to be personal? Your personality and persona is shown through the themage, diction, overall content – it’s what makes something personal. My blog is a pretty personal blog, but my posts get extremely raw (sometimes trigger-worthy) and sometimes opinionated. I don’t read your blog often, but I feel it’s a personal lifestyle blog, because you do share a lot about yourself. Your lifestyle is personal. Your blog is personal. When I read your posts, I often feel like I’m sitting on a couch in my pajamas with a blanket to stay warm and watching a movie on Netflix. That’s my comfort feeling/my go-to comfort zone. Not many blogs can do that, because not many blogs have that personal feel, you know?
P.S. I admire your bravery! Using surveys is dangerous, and it takes loads of guts to request feedback!
I find it interesting that you received that kind of feedback because while you don’t detail your day-to-day life I still feel like your readers are able to see your personality and get to know you through your posts.
I love your vision for The Nectar Collective, though! And your vision for the blog totally fits the name of it.
Thank you Crystal! I’m glad you feel that way. 🙂 And I’m glad you dig the vision I have for the blog! I was nervous people wouldn’t like that idea, but I’m glad that doesn’t seem to be the case. 🙂
I can see what people are saying, but I also feel like I know who you are and connect with you as the blog author, which is the important part for me. 🙂
Thanks Stacia! I’m glad you feel that way! That’s one of the biggest things I’d like for people to feel here.
I understand your vision for the blog but I think, ultimately, you have kind of have to pick IF you’re running your blog as a business. Y’see, my blog is a personal lifestyle blog, it’s about my life and all it’s aspects but I also offer small business advice because I run a business. But the emphasis is on lifestyle PLUS business advice but from a personal perspective. I’m not selling anything because I don’t want to monetize my blog. But with TNC, it’s a monetized blog PLUS some lifestyle posts.. There’s nothing wrong with that at all and I think your personally definitely shines through. But I think, when it comes to monetized blogs or blogs run for profit, there has to come a moment of decision. Do you want it to be an aid for your business? Or do you want it to be a personal blog with advice posts?